I've been dealing with thoughts of my transfernce T all day and its been very hard. I think I'm just dealing with memories of this time in 2020. I just ordered 10 tubes of that candy I like that reminds me of her.



I know I just shouldnt listen to music that bothers me but I feel connected to it and unable to let go the same way I cant let go of the candy. My mom doesnt know why I do most of the stuff I do. But I do plan on discussing the music part in therapy at my next session since we have never discussed that before

I've tried cancelling my music subscription a couple times but I can't sleep without it and I've tried deleting specifc songs but I've always ended up downloading them again.

I don't get what my issue is. I wonder if the idea of possibly seeing my pdoc in person is setting me off as well.