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Old Jan 02, 2022, 12:04 PM
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nonightowl nonightowl is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: TARDIS
Posts: 12,526
Quote:
Originally Posted by InkyTinks View Post
I'm sorry to hear about your friend passing. It must be harder if the death is sudden, especially if it is an 'internet friend' that you have limited ways to confirm it.

In my friends case I knew she had a progressive condition and was mostly bed bound. Her remaining brother posted on her FB page the day she passed and also told people she had selected to get a personal letter too (I received a private email too before it was put on FB)

My parents both had cancer so again I knew what was coming! ..as there was not the same treatments years ago that there are now.

My avatar is just a picture I found on the internet but she looks similar to a 'young me' and was also a character from a Final Fantasy game on the original playstation that I used to play.
Yes, it was hard to have a sudden death, but I'm not sure if it's harder than knowing a death is coming, such as a terminally ill parent.....(which I had also)

I found out about my Internet friend because her dad sent me a PM, but I also lost a real life friend suddenly yet had no way of knowing what happened to him. I didn't find out until about 2 months later----online. He worked in the entertainment industry at a well known company, and I found a short article about him. The words made me freeze: "___________dead at age 54." Finding out that way was a double edged sword. I didn't think I'd find anything, but it was my last resort.

Still, cold way to find out. We didn't have mutual friends. Before I saw the article, I tried calling and got a message the number was out of service. He had stopped showing up at the library weekly as usual. I went to his building and buzzed the intercom. Same message that it was out of service.

Like you I lost both parents to cancer, 2 years apart. One was sudden, one was progressive but nobody communicated with me about it. I'm not sure if it was easier knowing someone is on their last days, not for me anyway. It's just different. I don't think I can compare them.

My parents were emotionally unavailable people and didn't discuss death at all, even when we lost relatives years ago. They didn't "warm up" during their last days but just got more distant and cold.

That's a whole other thread.

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Hmmm....looks like some good tips in here.




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