Mate, DON’T. I have been in 2011 in similar position myself. I wanted to be it done in a bathtub. And when I was there lying, water all over, I was too clumsy to even do that. But I got help and I got through. Yes, there will always come some little hells every now and then. But keep on walking, and walk head high. Live the life. Have faith. Think about all those positive moments you had - those small but important gems - and that many of them will come.

I hope you will get help ASAP. I do feel with you, mate. But it’s not worth it. As one famous Swedish rockartist (who too had some struggling in his life) wrote on one of his albums from 1977:

“Why should you take your own life when you anyway can’t hear the talk afterwards.”

His name is Magnus Uggla. And yes, he too had suicide-thoughts, like you, me and many, many others. He will be 69 this year and still going strong, doing his rock-musicals and so on. So don’t give up the hope! Find a way to clear the dark thoughts - and fight! I wish you all the best![emoji3590]