Hi all,

New to the form here,

I experienced psychosis back in 2007 and it wasn't fun, I was diagnosed in a jail cell with Bipolar disorder and Mania. You can imagine how that went and now I am struggling with a weird form of PTSD from that experience.

But anyway, if it is any consolation it seems to me that you are more likely under a lot of stress than psychosis, based on my own personal experience. But left unmonitored extreme stress can turn into psychosis. When I experienced my psychosis I was struggling with existential anxiety and panic attacks at that time and had gotten off my anti-depressants cold turkey. That combination triggered my episode.

15 years later after recovering from that incident, I am now trying to manage my own business and be a provider to my family. And your post is currently reminding me of my current situation. Coming from someone who experienced both psychosis and extreme stress at one point in my life, I have learned to tell the difference.

Keep in mind I am not a professional just sharing my personal experience and you should always seek professional help if you feel it is escalating.

But it seems to me that you are experiencing symptoms that are stress related.

Waking up with music in your head, monologuing in your brain about "have too's" maybe ranting of things (symptoms of rumination), and emotional hypersensitivity about things and events. Are symptoms of extreme stress that may trigger mania but good news is that is can be managed and you will noticed the symptoms subsiding. If you practice stress relieving exercises. (Companied with proper treatment from a professional of course).

* meditation,
* exercise
* eating healthy
* get plenty of sleep (Very Important) <------ Can't emphasis this enough

You may not be able to control the external at the moment but you have control of your mind and how it reacts.

Try practicing breathing exercise and remind yourself "This is temporary, this bad moment it will pass."

And most importantly be positive, like saying positive montages. Listen to positive music and avoid negative toxic media as much as possible.

The brain has a funky way to echo back what you absorb from the media.

When you absorb positive input, your brain echo's positively back to you.

If you absorb negative input, your brain will echo negatively back to you.

Hence why sometime I hear my brain talk back to me. They are just echo's of what I absorbed from the previous day.

Keep a journal, sometimes jotting down things is therapeutic and helps with rumination issues.

Hobbies also help, I like to cook it helps me with my Zen and distracts me from negative thinking and brooding to much.

Do cognitive preventive maintenance "Emotional Hygiene - Guy Winch Ph.D", like how a car needs a check-up and oil changed from a mechanic. Your mind does to, talk to a therapist even if you are okay. We absorb a lot of negative junk from the world and talking to someone helps a lot.

I hope this helps and God Bless.