Would appreciate your views/advice on this please.

May seem a minor subject but given the history involved (my sister-in-law's behaviour), not sure which way to go.

My older niece (her daughter) has totally ignored two texts. One congratulating her on pregnancy, the other a thank-you for Christmas present. Back in August, I didn't get usual birthday card and present. Possible reason is I've stopped sending her son money for his birthday. He's 12, not a nice child and never once says thank you, so he only gets a card now.

Moving forward to Christmas, I sent them a card and presents (money). Boxing Day, my mother handed over gift from niece as she'd seen her on Christmas Day. It was a gift card for a well-known online shopping site. Can't help thinking it was done at the last minute because there was no Christmas card. My aunt is friendly with her, so I know that if I say anything, it will get back. This happened Christmas two years ago when I suddenly received a text two days after conversation!

It's niece's birthday end January and dilemma is do I send monetary gift or just the card? At the moment, I'm erring towards the latter. Don't want to appear as spiteful as she is.

Up until the sister-in-law problem, I regularly got birthday and Christmas cards, presents too. Even after. I also think it's something to do with what my mother has said.

I am retired, therefore have limited income. Maybe I should just use that as the reason, if ever asked. I realise this may seem trivial, but belonging to a manipulative family keeps you on your toes!