**** me. I am so incredibly depressed. I have to give my son an at home test when I pick him up, he got exposed and is showing symptoms. He ALWAYS has a cough and stuffy nose all winter, pretty much all year if he doesn’t take his allergy med daily, but it is worse in the winter. But I noticed this morning he’s stuffier and coughing a lot which he doesn’t usually do, and if he’s been exposed I’d feel like a right a-hole assuming it’s nothing. He was allowed to stay today bc he is vaccinated.

I left work early anyway. I’m going to be so screwed in my end of year review. But I just can’t do it every day right now. I’ll get a note from my pdoc if I have to.

No stomach pain or nausea at all today. I got an upset stomach yesterday after eating a grilled cheese and creamy tomato soup, though, so signs are pointing toward dairy intolerance for the other digestive issues that have been there since august. The soy milk on cereal is fine, silk green coconut milk yogurt is good, and dark chocolate is fine because proper dark chocolate contains milk fat which only has minuscule lactose. Haven’t found a decent ice cream but I can eat sorbet. It’s the cheese that makes me sad. I hope if I detox for a few weeks I’ll be able to have cheese once in awhile. Mainly pizza and other Italian food. I don’t cook with other types of cheese because my boys only like mozzarella as well.

I’ve been suffering from SH and SI thoughts today which sucks. I will take no action though. I just keep telling myself 20 years is long enough.

Ugh I ****ing hate this. Why did the new med have to **** up my stomach??? What now? I want to get rid of all of them. I definitely won’t so don’t worry, but it is tempting.