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Originally Posted by Etcetera1
Could you say a bit more on how it can be a tool to control me?
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It is definitely easier to leave a relationship and cut ties when you are not legally married. Obviously, divorce laws vary around the world but it can be a drawn out and expensive process in many cases.
If you have a child with him, you are most likely going to still have to deal with him on some level at least until the kid reaches adulthood and sometimes more related to issues like child support and visitation. I know that there are cases where a noncustodial parent signs away their parental rights, but that is rare.