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poshgirl
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Member Since: Sep 2018
Location: Birmingham UK
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Default Jan 17, 2022 at 07:37 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovethesun View Post
you bring up a good point poshgirl. My brother is married to a very toxic person. His wife is a witch and I'm convinced she has a forked tongue. She has caused my brother's personality to change, and his relationship with me, my sister and my mother has changed alot too. My dad was handicapped from a stroke for several years, my brother had to be forced to come up just to cut my dad's hair. After my dad passed away, my mom needed help as a widow. My brother hardly ever came. It was always my husband or my sister's husband that helped her. My mom developed a terrible alcohol addiction (I posted about it here) and my brother NEVER helped! Not even once! He lives 3 blocks away from the detox center I had to put my mom in. I live 40 minutes away from it. My brother would not pick her up the day she was discharged. My husband and I had to leave work and drive 40 minutes to go pick her up. My brother's wife does not like us. So that's definitely part of the problem. But if my brother and his wife expect all of us to attend their events, then he needs to afford the same consideration to us when we plan something.
This is so familiar! My brother has always been mother's favourite and now he's where she wants him to be. Having experienced her unacceptable behaviour, I distanced myself. Won't go into detail but he's had to do a lot more for her. His wife has made derogatory comments about my mother and aunt. I only recently repeated them to my aunt. Waste of time with mother as I'd be to blame as the messenger. Although they have to take holidays outside of term time, he's never once asked if I had any plans. It's just assumed I'll fit in with everything they do. After all, "they've done so much for me".

Now I don't get invited to anything to do with them, he has to do a 10+-mile round trip to ensure mother gets there. He's had to rethink his drinking habits too. The arrogance is unbelievable.

Your course of action now is the best. You're showing that you can rise above their behaviour. One day he could need your help....
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