I'm wondering what people think. If something sexually arouses you, but you don't want it or it's impossible to even engage in it, does that make you that label...?

Example:
If you're a woman and are aroused by lesbian sex thoughts, does that make you a lesbian? What if you have no desire for lesbian sex?

The flip side is what if you're a woman aroused by gay sex thoughts? You can't be a gay man...

What about paraphilias?