Hell-oh L. SO what do you know about that?! I had the epiphany earlier today while talking with H on my lunch break that you were f'ing right all along about me wanting life to be a Hallmark movie. I'm embarrassed as all hell about it but damn it it's true isn't it? I do. I want everything to be nice and sugar-coated and everyone is lovey-dovey. I want perfect, scripted, feel-good endings to every relationship including ours.

But I'm not on TV and life doesn't work that way. It's messy and imperfect and ****ing glorious anyway. And that's why I didn't get the perfect scripted ending from you that I wanted (re: the letter you said no to).

I really want to call you and tell you that I have come to this realization. But I'm not going to because you know why? Because the longer I don't call you to check in, the more **** like this I'm going to realize, I betcha.

2 glasses of wine later and, I up'd my TV package so I can start watching actual Hallmark movies and get my fix that way.