The worst part of this is that when I vegetate and neglect everything, I start to lose self-respect. I can indulge myself for awhile . . . and I do. I have no trouble cutting myself some slack now and again. However this has gone on two weeks that I haven't put away holiday decorations.

My goal was to get that job done by Jan. 10th. So it's now about 10 days that I've been dragging this project out. I was doing at least a little each day. I told myself that even a little is something. I said anything is better than nothing. But today it was pure nothing.

I worry that this feeling will never go away. That's plain silly. I'm prone to episodes like this. They always blow over. But I worry I won't shake it this time. Even though I always think that . . . and it never proves true. I know how to do the dialectical thing. It just never helps me. This is why I don't do therapy anymore. I've already heard their theories.

Maybe tomorrow will seem better.