You really didn’t have to explain anything. It’s not anyone’s business why you are leaving. I am with your dad in this. If someone insists, then making more money is good enough, have to save for retirement. Or not having to commute anymore. But even that not their business. “It’s a decision I had to make for myself and my family”.

No other reasons needed.

And usually it serves no purpose to tell higher ups (when resigning) that they don’t run their business right. First of all they typically know but just don’t care. Second of all they’ll say it’s her subjective opinion plus she was a bad employee and likes to place the blame. It’s not like your feedback is going to improve the company. It won’t. It’s not like they live in the dark and see the light because of your revelation. They aren’t dumb. They know

You can use other people for actual reference. Doesn’t have to be him. He is unprofessional. I’d not worry about making him writing you positive references. If someone calls him as a former employer he can’t speak poorly of you anyways. It’s not how it’s done

I understand being a worrier but stop worrying about stuff that’s not important.