Quote:
Originally Posted by Mendingmysoul
I ruminate all the time.I try very hard to divert myself from it.I find crafts very soothing and to be good distractions. They take away focus from ruminations .But I can't do it for long.So I take distracting activities for shorter lengths of time.Some days nothing works. On those days I do not force myself.I just ruminate. If I feel like crying because of bad memories, I just cry.sometimes crying brings relief.
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Thanks for saying this. I haven’t cried over this I don’t think but what kills me is I let it go for a long *** time. This happened around 2017. It bugged me at the time and I recall being so stressed at that job and my then therapist was helping me work through this toxic place. I’m mad at myself for staying. I’m mad at myself for not standing up for myself. I’m mad at myself for being whatever he thought I was. Part of thinks I need to forgot him and then maybe I can move on. It hurt me to my core. It was just words but I cared about my job and he made me hella nervous. I would always screw up around him and not find the right words and answers. What the ****! Now it’s back and daily! In the shower and all the time. I need to make it stop it’s like groundhogs day :O