Thanks much for your description of the felt sense and sense of danger. That was very interesting.

What I'm actually trying to do here is in part getting clarification on what the particular felt sense is that I'm having.

No, I'm not fully feeling all the emotions yet.

And it's hard also when I don't know what a truly good relationship feels like. Like I said this is a long-standing problem in my life that I'm working on.

But I'm also a lot like, I just want a looooong rest from all of it, I totally feel like I want to just withdraw from all emotions about this relationship for a while.

For a while I'll just be fine with periodically reading and picking up on things from relationship books and articles and even posts on here.

And afterwards, perhaps asking more on this thread, but I don't have any new questions or further thoughts about the relationship for now.

Anyway. What I was doing here above was, I asked about a clarification about some bad behaviours from the list on that site. I think all the answers helped me see it better, yes.

Then I asked if it makes sense to use behaviours of ignoring to seek attention.

I'm still interested in whether that makes sense. That's simple curiosity. I realise other explanations and perspectives exist too, so it's not really me wanting to decide that it must be this one.

So like, I don't really have an opinion on that.

I'm mainly just satisfied that I've worked so hard on not getting affected anymore by being ignored by people who I've paid attention to previously. That's something I worked really really really hard about, in the last few months.

There's a lot more things to work hard about. But this was a major thing for me for many years, and not just in this relationship.