Will19, we appear to be of similar ages.

I touched on the intervention problem, or should I say interruption. My brother's other problem is he totally believes everything our mother tells him, to the point of repeating lies rather than listening to the truth.

An example. Just after the problem with my sister-in-law, we met at mother's house. When I ventured that her lashing out at me was domestic abuse, he laughed and said I got that nonsense from spending all day on my computer. Despite denials, I knew exactly where that had come from. I've been shown more kindness and respect on a hobby-related site than I've experienced from family over the past 2 years. I've never met these people in person; says a lot!

I know people who have let go of parents too. Often also sacrificing wider family relationships, possibly to avoid the issue of taking sides. It's only natural for us to feel guilt, regret, sadness. As I may have said earlier, this often happens when we grow older (wiser?!) and realise the dynamics have changed.