Quote:
Originally Posted by mote.of.soul
@ Sohappy
I think in a general sense, and going by my own personal observations and experience - yes, emotions can be our so-called 'enemies'. That's if we don't have good emotional coping strategies or coping skills (or meds) or are just completely overwhelmed by the emotions to the point of confusion and chaotic thinking. And I'm mainly referring to the emotion of anger where the possibility of doing harm in one form or another is probably the greatest.
But whether we call our emotions the 'enemy', or 'normal', or some other thing, it doesn't matter. It's still the same.
For me and my mental ill-health, it's all about trying to see my emotions for what they are: how they effect my thought processes, my decision making processes etc., actions etc., and then doing as little harm as humanly possible to the self and to others (and in a broader sense, that could include harm to animals and even to the planet) as well - and just taking it from there. Trying to grow as a person.
We will of course, mess up here and there - everyone does - but as they say: it's a 'journey'. 🙂...🤔 |
Yes I totally agree but I think it can be hard recognizing for what they were/are. It's scary for that it could a very long time to take some people to "grow as a person" and many might never change and are too stubborn because they think their thinking and feelings are right.
I am feeling tremendous guilt and regret how I allowed my emotions to control my decision making. For example, the rejections I received for applying for jobs were too painful and made me insecure and the rejections I got from other people when asking for help were hurtful that I didn't bother trying anymore because it got too scary and I couldn't get any help. I suffered joblessness. It caused issues with my family who hated me for not working in my field.
It took a lot of time for me to come back and reschool myself in my field because my skills were obsolete. And I had to apply for jobs again and the rejections got too much again. And again, I got rejection from employment agency who told me that I could practice mock interviews on my own and they didn't want to help.
I finally have a job now but it's a constant struggle with no confidence in myself. And being told that I don't know how to behave appropriately by my manager and colleagues. I don't know how to speak up when appropriate and when to stay silent until I have all the information. I feel embarrassed for not knowing.
My job does gets overwhelming and stressful. My job becomes more micromanaged by them as I don't have a lot of confidence and it has to be done their way.
I don't watch TV or movies because it's overwhelming so I realized that my life is mostly centered on my job.
I wanted to try to find a hobby outside work.
I have my one best friend outside of work. I was hoping to do art work together but I had the wrong idea that she was ready to do coloring but she didn't mean now. She didn't make her intentions clear. And I felt embarrassed that I thought we had the same goal and intentions as i told her about my fears about using the art supplies and was looking for someone to do it with.
She wanted to practice drawing which is fine but her remarks and opinions about our drawings not being good enough were starting to make me uncomfortable but she still wants me to show her my drawings which I don't really want to anymore. I don't know how to overcome my lack of interest in drawing and coloring after I spent so much money buying the supplies and I am still buying more because I need paint brushes, etc. I hope I don't just accumulate all the supplies and never use them.
I am tired of myself of not knowing how to relax and calm my emotions and just do my job and my art without obsessing over my emotions that keep overreacting. I know it's my problem.
It's easy for me to 'feel' rejected and it's hard to tell myself to not worry about it. It wasn't really a rejection and just move on.
I hate my emotions and just fight against it and just want to accomplish goals I set up for myself.