I'm not sure this will be helpful at all, but at a certain point I stopped dating people I didn't already know extremely well. In general now, I only consider as possible partners people who have already been my friends for years. Would it be possible, or helpful, to take a step back and focus establishing some strong friendships?

I don't do well in parties and also tend to freeze. Could you go with a friend and agree that you stick together? You might feel more comfortable chatting with other people if you have a friend with you.