Thread: Too Attached?
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Old Jan 31, 2022, 06:40 PM
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velcro003 velcro003 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2008
Posts: 7,383
Quote:
Originally Posted by susannahsays View Post
Can you talk about it to your other therapist?
I could, but I don’t think I actually can. She knows I cringe when we talk about our relationship. I mean it took me SIX YEARS to admit to her that I cared about her. Lol.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElectricManatee View Post
This whole bit of information tells me that she already knows about your feelings and is okay with them. Your reactions to her and to your own intense feelings are really normal for somebody with attachment things up work through. I think the chances of her being surprised or upset if you talk to her about your feelings are vanishingly small.
Thank you for this. Maybe she does. I kind of wish I knew, but I am entirely too scared to bring it up to her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
When I first talked to L on the phone, I knew I was going to get attached. Then after I had my intake with her, I was attached. I couldn't stop thinking about her. I wanted to see her asap. But I was still with T for another month and I couldn't. But I had a ton of guilt feelings for already being attached to L. I felt like I was cheating on T. That feeling lasted a long time. Especially when T came back from maternity leave and I chose to stay with L. I knew I was making the right decision for me, but I felt like I abandoned T. Both L and T worked together reassuring me, encouraging me, and supporting my decision. Now, after almost 3 years, I've come to terms with my attachment to L. It's intense still, but becoming more secure. And I no longer feel I've abandoned T. T is still there when I need her. I now have two great therapists.

I think it does get better. But I found talking to both of them and both of them working together really helped me come to terms with it all.
Thanks Scarlet. And YES, it feels a bit like I’m cheating on my T. I don’t like it, and could never tell her this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight View Post
I agree with this assessment.

I hope what I said about Dr. T wouldn't at all scare you off from talking to her about it. If she did these things for you on her own, I agree that she's likely aware of the attachment (though maybe not to the degree) and OK with it.
Thanks LT-and no, you didn’t scare me off
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel, SlumberKitty