I relate. Years on and I still remember how my father would nitpick every word, my tone, and all kinds of stuff while I'm in the call. Loud enough for the other side to hear, and make it tough for me to hear their replies.

One time it was a call to emergency services because I thought a friend attempted suicide. (Friend was OK in the end, thankfully.) He knew it was to emergency services as it was past midnight, and I told him to shut up because I can't hear the operator.

I wish I had a solution to reduce the immense anxiety around phone calls