Forever girl – It sounds as though you’ve found a wonderful man. I tell my daughter and my nieces that if they get involved with a man with a child, find out how involved he is in the child’s life. He won’t treat you any better than he treats his own child. And you wouldn’t want to be with a man that would put the new woman before his child. All of these things speak to him and his character.

That being said, you are so young. If you want this to last forever you have to accept the fact that he has a child with someone else, and that this child is very important to him. At the risk of sounding unsupportive (which is not my intention) wives/girl friends come and go, but your kids are your kids for life.

If you really do want to make this work, don’t view this child as a rival for his attention. She needs it and is entitled to it. Fall in love with his child as well. She’s a part of him, take a genuine interest in her. Then you’ll be included in the circle. But don’t forget, she is entitled to some Daddy and me time on her own. Look at the situation realistically. Many young women make the mistake in thinking that the situation will somehow change once you get married, that a marriage certificate somehow means that you are entitled to more attention than his child.

Try looking at it this way, if it was a child he shared with you, how would you feel if your daughter was playing second fiddle to the new woman in his life? I would bet money that his wonderful sense of responsibility is one of the things that attracted you in the first place.