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Originally Posted by SlumberKitty
When former T retired she told me about 3 months before. I immediately began looking for a new T which kind of freaked her out (...) In the meantime former T un-retired. I tried to go back to her but she told me no. So what was all that bother about it not being the end? I called her on that in an email and she basically said she couldn't be the therapist I needed her to be. Again, what the hell.
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Yeah that's totally "what the hell". It's not OK for her to not discuss with you first if she thought she can't be the therapist you need. Because if there is no open and honest discussion about it, they are only guessing what you need, and without confirmation and discussion that can go wrong really easily.
Plus that thing about her getting freaked out sounds like she managed to involve her own emotions in an unprofessional way in all of this. Bet it affected her image of what therapist you'd need her to be.
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All I can say is that it is very painful. It does get better. But it hurts like nothing else has hurt before. Sorry to be so disheartening. That is just my experience. YMMV.
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I will just say this....What's the point of therapy if it just adds more trauma when ending it?
(Rhetorical question, no need to answer)
Sorry OP that I'm not able to give any useful advice.