It's like.. I want to get to the place, back before I was like everyone else - Put into an internment camp (School). And the way I reacted to it was not like everyone else.

So I want to focus, not be suicidal, do my things.. Catch up. Erase all of it and replace it with what who I wanted to be. The PTSD, paranoia and hyperphantasia - No damn psychiatrist.. with their need to feel powerful over me when I asked for help, running through loops and loops of corruption and evil of the world. It was all reaction for what I didn't understand.

But I understand now.. I see through the game.