I am so sorry you are in that situation. How heartbreaking! I wish I had something helpful to offer, but sadly I am at a loss. There is a CBT technique that I have used with some success in a similar situation. One imagines that one's brain is a small child in one's care and then one surrounds one's brain with love for every kind of thought or feeling that pops into one's mind.

For example,

I love you little brain even though you are feeling very sad.
I love you little brain even as you feel hope.
I love you little brain even though now you are feeling hope is false hope.
I love you little brain even though now you are feeling angry about feeling hope.
I love you little brain even though now you are feeling very conflicted in your feelings.
I love you little brain even though now you are feeling anger.
I love you little brain even though now are feeling angry at yourself for being angry.
I love you little brain even though thoughts of frustration are flowing through your consciousness.
I love you little brain even though thoughts of being frustrated at being frustrated are happening to you.
And, and, and . . .

I think the point of this exercise is to allow whatever flows into one's consciousness to happen without judgment or censorship and then just envelop it in love.

This technique helps me a lot but not sure how helpful it would be to you or others. Sometimes one wants to be helpful and yet doesn't know how. I sure hope you find something that helps you.

Sometimes the passage of time helps a lot. I hope others here will have something really helpful to offer you. My heart goes out to you!