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chaotic13 said:
So today I had a follow-up with my family physician.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">What was this a follow-up to? Was it a follow up to discuss the status of your ADHD treatment? If so, your doc must have thought it quite strange that you scheduled an appointment only to say, "OK I guess, It's not a cure all, Nope I'm doing well." I think if I scheduled an appointment for a specific reason and that's all I had to say, my doc would think it was kind of strange. If this appointment wasn't to follow up on ADHD but some other reason (an infection or something), then I can see how it would have been hard to talk at length about the ADHD topic. I find when I schedule a doctor's appointment, they want to know what it is for, and then they budget the time accordingly. It is hard to try to pack too many topics into one appointment.

I suggest you make an appointment specifically to discuss your ADHD treatment and progress. Then there will be no "escaping" the topic when you meet with your doc. As part of the ADHD topic, I would think the weight issue would naturally arise.

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Its the same thing with the ADHD medication. There was no evaluation done, the neurologist just basically asked me a few questions and gave me an Rx....

I have no idea if I really have ADHD

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">chaotic, I think I remember once you said you had been prescribed an anti-depressant. What doctor did that prescribing? Was it your GP, a pdoc, who? I'm wondering if you can see an expert for your mental health prescribing? It doesn't sound to me like the neurologist is an expert; maybe he only knows ADHD and not other mental issues? I wonder if you were very convinced that you have one specific problem--ADHD--and marched into the doc's office, armed with your journal articles and online assessments, and said "I need ADHD treatment" and then no other causes were really considered? I mention that because of my own recent experience with the psychiatric nurse practitioner who listened to my symptoms but is finding her way to her own diagnosis. She is not relying on me for evaluation and diagnosis. She has told me ADHD-like symptoms can result from anxiety or depression too. Did you ever have a full work-up, based on your symptoms, from a pdoc or a PNP?

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I have so many questions yet when given the opportunity to ask them and get answers, I don’t.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Could your therapist help with this? Could she consult with your doctor and share your and her concerns? Then the "telling" would be out of your hands and she would make sure to get the job done. This could be a BIG help for you.

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I didn't want to be mentally ill.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">chaotic, maybe you need to reframe this. I don't consider myself mentally ill. I have been severely depressed but am not anymore. I might still be depressed to a lesser extent--I don't know. I might have Anxiety. I might have ADHD. But I don't consider myself to be mentally ill. I know that there is a huge range in human variation and there is no one "right" way to be. I also know that depression is an adaptive response to stress and so my reactions to life circumstances have been completely normal and even selected for throughout millions of years of evolution. Even without what stress does to our biochemistry, there is a huge range in the natural "set" points in our levels and metabolism of neurotransmitters, etc. If a person has low serotonin, well that's a natural way to be, not an illness. They can take some meds to boost their serotonin to feel better, but it doesn't mean the person was necessarily mentally ill. He's taking a drug to alter his setpoint a bit, within the range of natural human variation. I guess my bottom line is, you don't need to be ashamed about your biochemistry!!! It's natural and within the range of human variation and perhaps due to your marriage situation, could be "worsened" by high stress. (And by saying this I'm not trying to minimize depression or other conditions we seek help with, but empower. I know firsthand how bad the symptoms are.)