I'm really sorry. I quit therapy before where it felt harmful, I think you have the right to do that if you feel the need for it. I think where she said that about suicide was really really unprofessional and unempathetic and harsh, yes.

In general, what I honestly think is that while therapy may help some, it can also be harmful, and even though all the psychoeducation is important, there are other things too, e.g. sometimes it's just the external situation that needs changed, rather than you having to try so much to "fix" yourself. That was an example only, it could be other things too, the point is that a lot of the time the solution isn't actually about "fixing" yourself.

And I've been there before where I was so low I couldn't do things even though I wanted to. The solution, ironically enough, was to just wait, like I was getting to do things really really gradually and not pushing myself anymore with expectations, let alone expectations on the timeline of how much or how fast I should be able to be doing things.

So I actually had to learn to hold myself less responsible. Getting free of being/feeling overly responsible. It helped a LOT. Because overresponsibility also contributed to feeling low. Maybe that's what you would need too, ie. feel less responsible, I don't know.

I wish you much luck with all this!!