My anxiety is super high today. I think its just situational stuff. I just had one bottle of regular Coke and then one diet Coke from Mcdonalds. So I don't think its caffeine related. I didn't sleep very well because of the anxiety. I tried leaving my house and I was going to go out to lunch but I ate a pack of caramel M&Ms and after I ate them I suddenly decided agaisnt going out to eat. I did get to the grocery stores but I was very distracted by my anxiety but luckily my mom reminded me of the stuff I needed. I stopped for a smoothie and a jerky stick and I was having trouble reading the menu. It was empty there and the smoothie guy didn't seem impatient. Now I am at home and I have the stuff I need and I don't have to go out until tommorow morning. I just wish I could catch a break from this anxiety. I have a headache and heartburn. I took a pepcid last night but I took another one just now along with 2 tylenol. That combo often works better then my pych meds. I did take my 3rd valium and my 20mil geodon but had no relief. So hopefully this stuff I just took works. I am not nauseated although my smoothie is not really sitting well with me. I have no clue on my diet today since I drank a 240 calorie Coke at 1:45AM along with a little bag of chips. Then I really wanted ramen at 6:30AM. So I don't know if I'm too low in calories because I ate stuff so early or what. Either way I am not starving right now.

Its early but I'm ready to just give in and take my 160 mil geodon now. My stomach is a mess. I'm sleep deprived. I'm anxious. What happens happens regarding the side effects at this point.

I took the geodon then I ate the jerky stick and I'm feeling better. I am still not hungry for an actual meal but I did an awful lot of grazing today so I don't think I should be hungry. I've just been grazing these last 3 days. In therapy we are working on just eating what I feel like I am able to when I feel like I can.

My sodium was a mess though.

I am wondering if the queen is on her way out. She's been under a lot of stress as it these past few weeks and now shes got covid. Plus she's 95.