Sadly, I think our system here in the US is a bit behind in that regard-- it seems first line treatment is always,

if manic and warranted =hospitalize.

if depressed and suicidal =hospitalize.

if depressed and not suicidal =well.. there's the issue.

Treatment can be really tricky and I understand that all too well -- there are so many factors to consider and so many personal, unique factors of every person like body chemistry and life stressors and events. I think the problem is there's not a quick solution, nor a easy one-pill to fix anything. Antidepressants take time to kick in after all. And sometimes, with bipolar disorder-- they can switch you into a manic phase-- assuming it works at all. Then there's other treatments like therapy and can also take time and also money.

I get what you're saying for sure. I don't know what your treatment team looks like, but maybe actually having a game-plan would be beneficial, some go-to options when you're depressed, or manic or whatever. Both pharmacological and non-pharmacological. I know I like to know "if this doesnt work, what's next?"