I really want message you to ask how you're doing, but I know I could be letting loose a whole raft of issues if I do that. On the other hand, I don't seem to be able to forget you and the impact you had on my life. Some days I feel so glad to have known you and to have had you in my life if only for a short time. Other days I (kind of) wish I'd never met you because all I'm left with is a pain which doesn't seem to be healing. I don't know what to do with these feelings, I don't know anyone who knows you, so I can't find out how you're doing.

Sensible me says stay away, emotionally attached me is telling me to pluck up the courage to message you or even ring you to find out how you are, and what's going on in your life.

I have been trying to process losing you with new-T but it's not helping. I just want the pain to stop.

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