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Old Mar 20, 2022, 05:14 PM
*Beth* *Beth* is offline
catches the flowers
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
Quote:
Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25 View Post
I am so restless and I believe it’s akathisia. Xanax calms me a bit and when I’m calm I’m steeped in despair. I am about 90% sure my clinician will be calling crisis on me tomorrow, but there is a chance she won’t.

I just feel like I’m at the end of the line. NONE of the meds are working. I know I have to hold out hope because I literally just started the depakote increase and cogentin to hopefully combat the akathisia. It’s just that vraylar was supposed to control my mood as well but it only controls paranoia. I mean that’s a good thing I guess. IP would keep me safe but I am not hopeful it would actually make me feel better.

I hit my head all morning but RS has the sharps/meds in his truck, including the things I can break apart. I can’t get into his truck because he has like 20 keys for his vehicles and work vehicles/machinery and I wouldn’t know where to even start to find which one it is. So that’s good.

I just really feel like I’m at the end of the line. I know this is probably just my illness talking but it’s so discouraging. I just want to go to sleep until this see saw is over.

Oh well as long as I’m calm I’m too depressed to move forward with destructive acts.

It does sound like your "med cocktail" could be a better one. Here's to hoping the depakote helps along with the Vraylar.
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