Communicating while under the influence of alcohol is bad to begin with. Alcohol affects the filtering senses in the executive part of the brain. And not for nothing but lots of people who have a problem with alcohol say they are only social drinkers. And for those who develop problems with alcohol there is a delay in normal maturity so a person even in their forties can only have the maturity level of a collage partier. Not to mention they tend to end up in dysfunctional relationships and boohoo they are the poor little victim when in reality they keep making poor choices.

It sounds like you both are lacking as you both consume alcohol and “party”. Sadly it’s only when someone stops drinking and lives sober and “grows” that they can eventually recognize they were making the same mistakes over and over again due to their alcohol using lifestyle.

It’s a red flag when you are dating someone that likes to “hang out” in the bars and use the “my hang out” language. And a person can go to a concert and have a good time without drinking and getting high like a twenty year old.