Quote:
Originally Posted by FeelingLost78
You are exactly correct. I know it’s best to break up with him, but I have a strong desire to wan t to work things out with him. I know breaking up is the right thing to do. Letting him go is not going to be easy because I have abandonment issues. I feel I’d rather be with him than be alone. My biggest fear about letting him go is that I’ll never meet anyone again. That’s why I’m hesitant to do that. There are plenty of people who never meet someone again. I’m terrified of that. I don’t need to be with someone, I want to be with someone because I want to settle down, get married again, and grow old with a person. That’s something I want for myself. It’s also very hard to meet single men in my town. Everything closes so early and the only things that stay open at night are the bars. The bar scene is not a place single women want to be at alone. Anyway, this is why it’s so hard for me to consider breaking it off with him.
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Do you mean you primarily want him just to have someone around, not because you are in love with him?
Quote:
Originally Posted by FeelingLost78
I then asked him if he can bring the book by after work tonight.
I also said, “ I understand your feelings and position on third and I do agree with you about us being toxic toward each other.”
He didn’t respond. Like I thought he wouldn’t. He’s said these sorts of things to me before like I’d be better without him.
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Sounds like to me he didn't respond about the book because it would mean things ended between you two for real?
Not that this is good news. He and you both should want to end this for real.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope
Well, it comes across to me as forceful when you use a texting app to get in touch with him, which forces him to talk to you. He blocked you everywhere, yet you're still trying to communicate via other means. That is forcing the issue. I can see why he says you're both toxic to each other. Your behaviors are not exactly mirroring what a stable healthy person would do. The healthy thing to do when someone blocks you is to give up and walk away, and for your own good.
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The thing is OP does have a right to talk to him though I don't think it's helpful to talk at all. I would say just because you block someone it doesn't take away their right to talk to you if the blocking was unfair. Now if it was more like he had told her he was done for real and hadn't sent her mixed signals afterwards, and if he had asked her to not bring up the topic of the relationship, she would not really have a right to talk to him about fixing the relationship. But just blocking on its own and an overemotional message about breaking up that he then changes (changes the message), that doesn't remove all her rights. Blocking someone is a cowardly thing and doesn't mean they can have what they wanted to achieve by blocking. Ie. it's not okay to use as a means of control, and you should not give in to said attempt to control you.