I can understand how triggering this must be. I am already triggered by more minor things and not having lost my previous T personally. But I do remember your story and think about it from time to time in my own life.

My T has recently had surgery as well, although a rather minor one. But he's getting older, and that that always creates stress.
I'm very hopeful that your T will successfully manage this surgery and then not have problems after. Although it is a scary diagnosis, it's one of the best treated cancers that I know of, especially if detected early.

I'll keep both of you in my thoughts, I really hope this works out for you!