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eskielover · Apr 03, 2022, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Etcetera1

Thanks a lot for the details. So just to clarify you were instantly able to write down all the words for 2 pages? Like you'd been feeling a lot of emotions already, they just were unrecognised and unnamed and unprocessed?

That makes sense, by situations I meant anything that's happened, even inside recalled memories.

I'm glad it's worked well for you. For me I was coming from the other direction, like, not feeling a lot, if I do feel something without having to block it out it feels like I've already got the majority of the work done. I don't take long to sort it out at that point. Though I do have to say that I still don't try to name small nuances, trying to do that hasn't helped me so far. I'm happy with just recognising/identifying it for the given situation, whether that's done verbally or nonverbally.

I think the anger I was feeling so overshadowed any other feelings I had that I didn't even realize I was or had felt them until I read the list & could identify that the words I read were ones I was feeling or had felt. My mom had died of cancer 2 years before I moved but the choices she made caused me to go through a trauma with the home care person I caught abusing her (financially & an OD on her pain meds) My mom made stupid choices & hurt me.
I was so angry at her, I never grieved her death. Lots of feelings associated with frustrations & hurts that were so overshadowed by anger even in my marriage I never even knew those were feelings that were going on at the same time.

For me the anger I was experiencing blocked out my knowledge of any other emotion going on because it was so overpowering. You know that saying "so angry I see red"? I thought it was just a saying till I experienced it with an interface I had with my now ex. I did experience fear with the home care person several times but my anger made me fight more than recognize the fear till after the situation was over & I started experiencing depersonalization issues. 15 years I have been away from it all & only some issues crop up but now my mind is finally in a state that solves issues rather than reacts to them in a dysfunctional way. My T was wonderful in integrating my past with my present & letting me know the feelings I had experienced were normal for the circumstances even with my dysfunctional parents & husband