Up until I met my husband I was in survival mode. There were casualties to how I lived. I don't know how to bring it up to my new T. My past have never been part of a discussion with a T because I don't want TRUAMA written on my record because I think that label is overused. Especially with SzA coloring my life. She'll be out after next week for a week. The things I need to say I've only said aloud once to H not even to WV T. How do I go about talking about past psychosis, behaviors, and the guilt that comes from it? Is it to soon to talk to her about it? Should I wait until she comes back? Does my past even matter vs. my feelings now? How do I keep myself from spiraling after talking about the things in my past? It's not fun feeling like a monster.
Do I just tell her "I feel like a monster" and just go from there? I'm in tears wrestling with this. We haven't even talked about SH yet.