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Old Apr 13, 2022, 06:35 AM
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Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,753
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rive. View Post
I believe it is always best to speak the truth even if it is not easy or comfortable to do so. But it is your decision, of course.

I think he ought to hear the truth, your truth. Why? First, because it *is* how you truly feel and this voice needs to be heard or at least expressed. Secondly, it might help him realise how he is with clients and how potentially damaging it is to be biased or dismissive of one partner.

At the end of the day, he was not good enough for you and he let you down majorly. You don't need to go 'all guns blazing' but I think (again, your decision) he needs to hear how this 'relationship' wasn't working for you.
Thanks, Rive, and I agree with your perspective. I DO need to be heard, especially since my own voice has been drowned out in our sessions. I feel dismissed. Whenever I've told him I feel invalidated, he tells me he is only trying to get me to see beyond a more narrow vision of things. Sure, but it still invalidates my perception of an event between my husband and I, whereby I felt disrespected by him. AND, when I've told my therapist that my husband was disrespectful, the therapist has discouraged me from using that word to describe an interaction. Once again, that invalidates my experience of an interaction between us.

Yes, I think he WILL hear the truth, and without guns blazing. lol.
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