I haven't posted much in a few weeks,but desperately need some support.

Recap:. My DH has significant undiagnosed issues going back 5-8 years- now more significant than before. Don't know what is problem is, looks a bit like bipolar, a bit like borderline, a bit like mdd, a bit like eod. Could be All of them, could be none.

He basically had a nervous breakdown last week. He's had some problems at work, leading to disciplinary action. Worst part about that is that his poor judgment was supported by his bosses, so he did it. And of course he's the only one on the hook for it. But he has cognitive issues and some other people were talking around in a way that got him confused. He felt they were doing it on purpose because they know he's struggling- I don't know. Can see it both ways. At any rate, he broke down and came home before they saw him distressed.

This is so unlike my husband of ten years ago. It is a 180 degree personality change. It's so scary to see him like this.

Amazingly, he contacted mental health help and was able to start with a counselor already. They didn't get much done in the first appointment, but he wasn't as resistant as he could have been.

He is also set to see a psychiatrist in a few weeks. He's much more resistant to that.

Before the breakdown last week, I have been exercising more and more boundaries. I am frustrated, sick, neglected, and getting close to my limit. Hope has left me. Even if my wonderful husband comes back, there is so much damage here. I have a teenager whose life has been upside down for way too long.

He's off work this week. He's mad that I put down the boundary of him not taking dd to school or picking her up. She needs relief from being around him, especially at that time of the day. He's been trying to use a lot of guilt tactics in regard to that, but they aren't working on me anymore.

When i got home this morning, we were chatting and I made(what felt like to me) a simple comment that I hoped he might be open to considering medication when he talks to the psych. I don't see that as a stigma and don't care if he ends up on meds, but his interpretation (which feels like borderline right now) was that I came at him yelling and screaming that he has to be on meds. I never said anything close to that, just expressed my own hope that he might consider the possibility- I know, stupid me, I should have known better. But every simple comment is twisted into a personal attack on him. It's been a hellishly long day.

I don't know how much longer I can live like this.

He's basically been avoiding me all day. Rational conversation isn't possible- and that's not just a today thing. Once again,my teenager has had to come home from school and see her father is a mess and that mess is controlling the mood of the house. We did our usual things, but it's a weight on the house still.

I love this guy and have compassion for him, but he is getting impossible to live with. I've made a decision to stop talking for the foreseeable future. I'll chat with him if something inane comes up, will get him for dinner, etc, but open ended conversations probably need to stop for now. Anything open ended is quickly turned to make him the victim, even the most minor things. I'm beat.

Seriously, how does one survive a one sided relationship? Can you?