Wow, I can really relate to what you're saying!!

I just had a long (11 day) break from T, and it's hard to think about going back. But part of me knows that I've already held on to this stuff for too long - it's time for me to go and heal. The thought of letting anyone in is so, so, so scary, but the times that I've opened up and let myself be vulnerable with T - especially doing trauma work - have been so healing. It's the first time I haven't felt ALONE with the trauma, which is a very powerful, healing feeling.

Even knowing that, I still hesitate to go back! This stuff is hard. But we can do it, and be that much stronger for it in the end.