You're right Rive, I think if it's anything I need right now it's a change of mentality and I think you're providing me both with what I want and need to hear. I used to view women a lot more positively than I do now. I've got a wonderful relationship with my mother and I had lots of opposite gender friends in high school and early on in college but maybe I've let my negative experiences have too much power over me.

As for downandlonely - I did not have sex at all. In fact I'm not known at all for pushing sexual desires. For the most part right now I just want friends and not romance.