Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostislost
I was thinking it sounded a lot like individual therapy between the T when I read the first part of your post. It took me so long to find a T that I felt ok with, it seems near impossible that one T could work well with 2 people in the same session!
I think wtf happened there is pretty much as you said...the T was on your partner's 'side', for whatever reason. So the therapy couldn't be helpful, she wasn't mediating, it sounds like she was punishing you for not being who your SO wanted you to be.
Of course your feelings are valid, the things you tried to bring up in sessions were very important, it just really sucks that you didn't have a very good therapist to treat you both equally.
The end of any relationship can make you feel like you failed, but it doesn't sound like you did.
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Hi Lost and thank you
It's only now that I reread my own thoughts that I'm struck by the irony of having a Therapist yell at you: 'Are you accusing me of being unprofessional!'
Rather like when someone screams at you: 'I'M. NOT. SHOUTING!!'.
I'll just add that we were with a very reputable British therapy institution, the name of whom is synonymous with couples therapy.
I don't know what was going on for the therapist at that time - perhaps on some level the T simply found me challenging/objectionable or was having a particularly bad day - but I was left feeling two things:
a. Appalled at how it was handled within the context of a therapeutic setting
b. Weak, useless and far worse than when we entered into it