So worked up today. I had to color during group because I just couldn’t sit there anymore. It helped. I squeezed my squeezy toy for the entirety of the afternoon groups. My hands kind of hurt lol.

I haven’t gone to the gym but I’m going to take a power walk around the neighborhood. I think the cold and sunshine will do me good. If I walk fast enough I won’t be cold lol. The temp isn’t too bad, mid fifties, but it is WINDY. Fire warning, red flag warning for the shore, AND freeze warning for tonight, all because of the wind. I’m mad about the freeze warning, I just want to put my basil outside and plant some veggies and herbs! I’d like to go to the nursery this weekend before my niece’s birthday party. I really wish it wasn’t at my SIL’s house. It’s a small townhouse and it’s always extremely messy which isn’t a problem, I mean they have a puppy and an eight year old, but it’s so cluttered it reminds me of my mom’s house which I hate. I never visit my mom because she’s a hoarder and my SIL’s house is just as cluttered because of its size.

I think my problem right now (one of them) is I’m quite enjoying being manic. It’s manifesting as absolute fury and that feels powerful, like I could kick anyone’s ***. When I’m home I don’t direct it at my family, I’m more just hyped at home, but everywhere else, yeah, I’m pissed. I love it. That’s bad, I suppose, because I could really get wrapped up in it. I AM getting wrapped up in it. Sigh…I guess I should try to bring myself down a bit before the spectacular crash we all know will come.

Oh, just to put everyone’s mind at ease, I’m only driving to drop my son off at school (.5 miles away) and the back way to and from program. Otherwise I stay home.