So H has been making sure I take my night meds but I freak out until I pass out from the sleep medication. I react like they are going to kill me even though I know they're saving my marriage right now. My paranoia has got to the point I'm pretty much in a constant panic attack. It's hard to breath. But taking the anxiety meds are going to spike my anxiety. The meds won't help if I don't take them but I need to not freak out and try to expel them from my body. I know my paranoia is wrong and the anxiety meds are in theory suppose to help but getting them down 3x a day seems insurmountable.