I’m sorry a lot for replying so late. Have been health problems but your friend was in my head.
Poor girl, she must be feeling without control over what’s happening in her life. And also feeling that she’s not accomplishing expectations and she punishes herself.
I think that’s by she lies on you. At least, to feel some kind of reassure she can’t get from people who are closer to her. I’m not criticism these people, please, take my words with good intention. It maybe simply that these people don’t know how to help her or maybe she can’t connect with them in this sense to find some comfort or she may be ashamed. There may be many explanations. No criticise at all.

I wish I could know how you could help you. I know you have tried many things. Any way, if it may be of any consolation. Sometimes, the fact that you hear her, it may be very helpful for her. On another side, I’m sure that fact triggers things up in you, however, you are there.

It’s a pity she doesn’t want to see a professional. These people together with the ones who went through the same problems as her and took their time to dive deep on what they were going through, the ones that can help her more.
I think this is the reason why forums like that exists. I have a friend with a similar but more severe psychological issue than me and I received a lot, a lot help from this person. You can’t guess.
Hope this happens a lot here among us.

From what your friend told you she may has Ptsd. Do you see as a good idea to post your thread also in the forum about PTSD? (If it does exist. I’m not sure)
Many people who posts here know a lot about PTSD. But, they know a lot. I have read their posts and maybe they can help with what they know.
Let’s see if all together can help a little to her.