Thank you for the questions. It gives me a few points to ponder. I didn't need to think about most of these in the past because both my father and grandmother had discussed it with me before guardianship was needed by several years. They trusted me to make choices that were in line with both their best interests and the personal choices they would have made for themselves.

With my sister, I have very little knowledge of her personal wishes, much like a court appointed attorney who may have never met her. A court appointed attorney also gets paid to be someone's guardian which means a portion of her assets and disability income goes for legal fees instead of medical care.

Question 5 is one I have been over and over and even emailed my therapist about last night. My sister would be extremely angry about the situation she's in. But I think if she were to recover, the anger would just be projected onto me. I would become her punching bag so to speak and that's drastically different from our current cordial at family gatherings minimal contact by mutual agreement.

Question 4 is a possibility, one I hadn't really considered much until you asked. Having a judge appoint me anyway replaces the moral dilemma with a legal decision. I suppose being appointed by the court regardless of my misgivings gives me a shield of sorts to deflect any anger my sister would have.