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SlumberKitty
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Location: CA
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Default May 10, 2022 at 12:19 PM
 
I am feeling so agitated. I know it is part of the schizoaffective disorder, but I don't get agitation very often, not this bad at least. I couldn't decide if I was hyper anxious or feeling paranoid so I didn't know what PRN to take but I finally decided to take the Lybalvi which is for the Schizoaffective Disorder, and which has some calming properties. Except I am not feeling very calm. I am having some trouble "sitting with myself" and I feel like I need to move, which unfortunately I am at work. I can take a walk to the water cooler or something but it's not going to settle down the part that feels so agitated. I keep rubbing my face and my hands and I'm sure it looks really odd and I'm trying to stop but I feel compelled to do it. I think I am anxious at the same time which is a lot of thoughts in my head that are difficult to sort. I think I am paranoid some today too which might just be a magnification of the anxiety, or it might be it's own manifestation, so I am trying to not feel watched and spied upon, at the same time, realizing that I am anxious and feeling like some stuff is out of my control. I am having a hard time being me at the moment. It does not help that I have very little to do at work at the moment, though I might get more work later. So I am having trouble getting sufficiently distracted or focused, so the face rubbing and hand rubbing goes on. I am trying to do deep breathing and meditation and stuff that I know should help but I am having trouble completing it. So I am talking about it here, of course, hoping someone will relate.

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