View Single Post
Quietmind 2
Poohbah
Quietmind 2 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2020
Location: Somewhere I'm working to leave
Posts: 1,243
3 yr Member
8 hugs
given
Default May 13, 2022 at 08:37 PM
 
Hugs if you want some, NP. There's no timeframe for "getting over" something, and you experienced prolonged abuse by your Ex.

If people can be bitten once by a dog and develop a lifelong phobia, which people respect... how much more what Ex did to you? Plus, your mother is being invalidating, and minimising.

Even if you were seeking attention (and my T says it's "connection seeking"), there's an unmet need there. To be seen, heard, cared about when you're having a difficult time over events which you feel shame about "not getting over it fast enough".

When I've asked similar "I should be over it by now", to my T (some events from my adolescence, so really long ago), she would say "whose voice is that?".

There's also a difference between talking about an abusive relationship VS processing the trauma from it, but I don't remember what it is. Other than it's the T's job to help so the client doesn't get retraumatised.

I'd be frustrated and stressed with your T's lack of clear plans.
Quietmind 2 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, SlumberKitty, unaluna
 
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight, unaluna