I'm so sorry that you are in that situation. Although we are not the same, I have been in similar circumstances and it felt awful.

There is a technique I learned from a psychiatrist called "Embracing the Fear." It helped me a lot and still does although since we are all different, I don't know if it would be helpful to you or others. So I am going to share it as something helpful to me and NOT as advice.

The idea is to embrace the fear or worry as a way of diminishing it or making it less toxic. Here is an example . . .

"I love you brain, even though you are generating a fearful thought about my future at work.
I love you brain, even though now you are generating fearful images about my future.
I love you brain, even though now you are generating fearful thoughts that I am going to fail.
I love you brain, even though now you are generating fearful images about what that failure will cause in my life.
I love you brain, even though now you are generating worry about me worrying so much.'
I love you brain, even though now you are generating angry thoughts at yourself because of your worry."

The idea is that the brain generates a constant thought stream. We hardly notice it when we are feeling okay. But when we are feeling not so good, we notice it. If we try to push the thoughts and images in this stream away, they just keep coming back and stronger and stronger. Instead of trying to push them away, we move towards them and embrace them. This takes away their power over us.

It is sort of like being in a real mountain stream where we encounter swiftly moving current. The idea is to step out of the stream and just observe it from above. Here is a worried thought. Here comes a scary image of the future. Here comes a worry about worry. Here comes a thought that worry is dangerous to us. Here comes a thought that worry will harm us because it doesn't stop.

Anyway, this technique has helped me a lot. I tend to get into terrible feedback loops of worry: health worries, job worries, relationship worries, financial worries and so on. And I was in a job situation quite similar to the one you describe.

Anyway . . . I apologize if I have been unhelpful to you. Hopefully others here will see your post and provide really helpful ideas to you. I hope you find a way to disarm your worries about your job and future.

One of the things we human beings fear most is loss of control over our lives. The psychiatric technique I shared with you is based on the idea called "paradoxical intention." Sometimes embracing something fearful disarms it while trying to escape it makes it worse.

Best of luck to you!