Still having a crappy, hard day with UGH. I had a trying conversation with one of my coworkers that is above me in the chain of command. I had asked her to be gentle with me today but I don't think she was. She said she's not mad at me but I don't believe her. She shut down the conversation. I went to my boss who knows about my Schizoaffective Disorder and such and told her that I was upset and worried. She said she would get back to me. She's probably sick of dealing with me too. I would be tired of dealing with me too. I want to cry but the tears won't come. Gah. 2 and a half days until the weekend, and my friend's memorial service is this weekend so it's not even like I am looking forward to this weekend. Life sucks right now. I already took some alprazolam because of the intense anxiety I had about coming to work. I feel like such a pain.