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Open Eyes
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Default May 23, 2022 at 06:05 AM
 
It’s ok to step back and see the reality and often one can even wonder why they did not notice these dysfunctional behaviors realizing how damaging they really are.

It really takes a qualified professional to get to the bottom of what you are experiencing in terms of your husbands mood swings and his not really being present in a functional way. Substance abuse often develops when someone starts self medicating as a form of escape from a mental illness of some kind. As I mentioned, often a person struggling with Bipolar disorder begins to self medicate in an attempt to escape from a depressive episode. It can also be a combination of both trauma and bipolar that someone starts self medicating with drugs or alcohol or both to escape from.

The problem with this is that it impedes growth and maturity and it also tends to be narcissistic where the person does whatever needed to maintain the habit. When it comes to bipolar for example, the mania may last longer and the depressive episodes may not be as severe, or one day can be up and down.

It really takes a true professional to slowly observe and diagnose and treat a person that struggles. If your husband is not getting professional help then he will just continue to self medicate and present with these dysfunctional behavior patterns and expect others around him to put up with him. As you know, it’s not healthy and not fair for you or your children to have to live with.

I do not think that you can negotiate healthy behaviors without professional help. Actually, you can make an already unstable situation even worse.
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Thanks for this!
Starlingflock