It has been so painful at times. I plead with them to stop but they only jeer & keep pain jabbing me, etc. It seems like there isn't anyone in my brain who cares. I have to endure it completely alone. I have been too warn out to do the things that need to be done. I'm so ashamed of myself. I keep hoping tomorrow will be the beginning of the change I keep waiting for. But there are breaks where I can relax somewhat & build some strength. If only I could hold onto that & learn how to obliviate them entirely.