After putting my cat down I saw a video from Lap of love about the "process" well it was very detailed and they talked about the roller coaster period. For me that was two years. But it is basically the period where the pet is ok for a while and then not... and I feel it is the time you need to come to terms with reality.

I was lucky this time was during the pandemic so I got to stay with him more than I might have otherwise.